Bored Guy: The bottle is -hic- half empty -hic-. Well, -hic- completely empty. - 11 pts
Busybody42: They're so desparate for good quality booze, they took the delivery motorcycle crash as an opportunity. - 3 pts
theMalcolite: As long as the drinking happens after the crash, everything is fine. - 9 pts
typelogin: Local delivery boy bribes officer with free Heineken to avoid traffic violation. - 6 pts, 3 vts
Edgelord77: ahhh just like prohibition times - 2 pts
SpryPyro: Making the best of a bad situation! - 7 pts
Khlaharah: When life gives you lemons...crack a cold one. - 12 pts
Boabe: When life drops som lemons on the ground, eat them anyway - 7 pts
Cruunchie: "Well, you broke the bike, lost most of your shipment, and will definitely lose your job. But hey you've made a friend!" - 7 pts
snarl: Although the hit & run driver was long gone, the Sgt still tried to catch the buzz off the streets. - 6 pts, 4 vts
kubo15: BYOH Bring Ya Own Heinekein - 2 pts
Tarjmov: Let's have a party! - 0 pts

		2			3	3			2	1			11
				3									3
	3			2	1	1		1			1		9
					2	2				2			6
											2		2
			3	1							3		7
2	2		1				2	2	3				12
3								3	1				7
		1					3			3			7
1	1	3					1						6
			2										2
													0

Dyne The Dying: "When you're texting your girlfriend and she brings up the last fight you two had again" - 1 pt

Pyacide: Apparently, "single chicks in your area" was a job description not a dating ad - 16 pts

SCRAGGYSCROO: YO SHIT DO I LOOK LIKE A CHICKEN HERE I JUST WANNA PLAY ON MY PHONE !!! - 1 pt

Tarjmov: Living in a Costco - 4 pts, 3 vts

Brocktoon: Do I look egg-cited to be at work today? - 4 pts, 2 vts, 1 3

Lack Luster: "I get laid a lot" - 10 pts

Rather Dashing: Tommy decided he would teach his grandmother to suck eggs no matter what - 4 pts, 2 vts, 0 3's

blockhead77: It was either sitting on these or the chickens - 8 pts

	1									1
3		3		3	1	3	3			16
			1							1
2		1		1						4
					3		1			4
1	3	2				2	2			10
	2		2							4
			3	2	2	1				8