Lord Helix: Follow Your Dreams

LordSnubbington: Kobe

Avandor: Turkey shoot! Gotta go for three!
Chadsworthy: Lennie soon discovered how expensive bowling lanes can be to repair.
Trick Deck: "The bowling alley was not impressed that John realized the cash prize of scoring a perfect game was higher than the cost of repairs from damaging the sprinkler systems"

Funrmunt: Just because I play basketball does not mean I can't be good at bowling. Oh wait...

Soxfan196o: he shoots going for the 10 point shot

MathEquals5: fuck it we ball

Jovid5: ballers dont miss

Rheia: Lawrence went for a hookshot as the bowling alley owner watched on in horror

hleghe: "getting revenge on the bowling animation for mocking you"

vrdt: the minecraft movie keeps finding ways to look worse, or so it seemeth - 3 pts

Gawea: Elon Musk leans into the economy car market with the Cyberjunker - 10 pts, 5 vts
potatolimerance: Well it certainly LOOKS like an improvement to the Delorean, let's see how much cocaine we can fit in it! - 9 pts

Funrmunt: The new Volvo's looking pretty nice - 8 pts

Rishi Sunak: Since I never managed to open the sunken chest, I upcycled it into a Popemobile. - 2 pts
Chadomancer: Sadly, the Griddle Car did not take off like they hoped it would as people complained of too many flies in their pancakes. - 10 pts, 4 vts

littlebitofSonshine: You sure that can hold all the beer? - 5 pts, 2 vts
Tyberos: "Alright, you've passed the drivers test, but made one mistake. Air freshner does not cover up the scent of dead hitchhiker" - 4 pts, 1 3
Rheia: "Their new mobile grilltop was sure to be a big hit at festivals. What's that crunch? Oh, that's a feature, not a bug." - 4 pts, 0 3's
Avandor: I dunno, Bob... are you SURE this is a prototype cybertruck? - 5 pts, 5 vts

					3					3
1				3		2	3		1	10
3	1						2	3		9
	2			2		3		1		8
2										2
	3	2						2	3	10
			3		2					5
		3	1							4
			2						2	4
		1		1	1	1	1			5

amoebalady: That day, as they were yet again dropping off supplies, the kids were finally resigned to the fact that there just was no convincing Auntie that the floor was not lava.

Funrmunt: So... who's gonna call the firefighter?

Soxfan196o: honey your shirt is wrinkled
Fart Scauce: When they couldn't install a handicap ramp, they took away the stairs so the store was nobody accessible

CrzyMdScntst123: Hole in the wall convenience is not very convenient.
Zanthia: Mrs. Lopez wasn't sure she was a cartel yet, but she had ambitions.

Chadomancer: Margarite subscribes to the Kenobi philosophy of shop security.

CaptainCavemaniac: I told you to buy me a ladder, and you come back with a magic bean!?!

LordSnubbington: Lana's Lofty Goods ~ gnomes/dwarves won't be served ~

littlebitofSonshine: That's when he knew. - 6 pts, 3 vts

Soxfan196o: first one to get up or make a noise owes me 100 push-ups - 7 pts

Tapion: I knew I should've stayed at home instead of enlisting - 6 pts, 4 vts, 1 3

MathEquals5: How long has he been sitting there like that? - 3 pts

Chadomancer: Some of you may die. Some of you will come home to broken families and empty houses. Some of you will get a sprinkler directly to the face. That is the price of freedom. - 6 pts, 4 vts, 0 3's

Rishi Sunak: Numbering off the platoon for field trials of the facial & rectal massage unit. - 3 pts

sdugicus: if you even flinch, maggots, the next sprinkle will be piss - 4 pts, 2 vts

Hippasus: In soviet Russia, ground spews on frat boy. - 6 pts, 2 vts

Unameme: And that's when everybody knew that sarge had found his porn stash. - 4 pts, 3 vts
efot: don't forget to bring a towel - 6 pts, 3 vts
Avandor: But on the other hand, nobody knew that Tyler lost bladder control. - 15 pts

		3				2			1				6
2							1	2		2			7
3			1	1						1			6
					3								3
1		1			2				2				6
						3							3
	3							1					4
			3						3				6
	1			2	1								4
						1	2			3			6
	2	2	2	3			3	3					15

 

LordSnubbington: Psst, dude. U want the sauce? Show me your meat. - 7 pts

potatolimerance: The hoisin sauce used to be a rare. I still hang onto it in hopes that age will increase its value. Most people assume I only hang onto it for sentimental reasons. - 10 pts
Chadomancer: When you're a boy scout, card collector, and foodie all in one - 2 pts
Soxfan196o: And this mustard is shiny numbered to 100 - 0 pts
sdugicus: sorry, the only thing I'm in the market for is some PSA 90 Horsey Sauce - 3 pts
drumset04: Still need the holographic Dijon ketchup - 8 pts
Stickmunt: They say I'm crazy. But one day, one day I'll retire off this collection - 7 pts
CheGuevara: "Yeah I arrange them by Scoville count" (SoCal Accent) - 2 pts
N00B1N4T0R: damn it, I got mustard in my sleeve again  - 9 pts

MathEquals5: I'll trade your hoisin sauce for my sweet and sour if you toss in that buffalo sauce I know you have but never bring to school. - 12 pts

						3	3	1		7
3			3		1		2		1	10
									2	2
										0
								3		3
	1		2	1			1		3	8
		1		3	3					7
								2		2
1	3	3				2				9
2	2	2	1	2	2	1				12

Zanthia: This wasn't what he imagined being sucked off meant. - 7 pts
N00B1N4T0R: When I said my favourite song was "put your head on my shoulders", I didn't mean it literally! - 3 pts
Soxfan196o: Head... Shoulders, Knees, and Toes - 3 pts
TrueTurtle: "Mmm, love a Dullahottie" - 1 pt

Antic the Fearless: When she said she wanted to get ahead in life, he wasn't expecting it to be his. - 16 pts

The_Dancing_Viagra: "not what I thought she meant by giving head" - 10 pts
LordSnubbington: My body can't keep up at this rate! - 3 pts
amoebalady: I *knew* it! She only loves me for my mind!!! - 11 pts

Not Me Yet: The Headless Horseman gets a girlfriend - 4 pts

Chadomancer: It was at this exact moment, the kiss he had been waiting for ever since he met her, that Craig realized he had left the oven on. - 2 pts

		1			3	3				7
1				2						3
2					1					3
								1		1
	3	3			2		3	3	2	16
3		2	2				1	2		10
							2		1	3
	2		3	1		2			3	11
			1	3						4
	1					1				2

Game Review: Cardbury

Planning a city is hard, building a place to fit the needs of a community takes forethought and resources, then once it's done you have to keep the dang thing from falling on itself. Many games have been made to simulate the activity and management of these things, from the family all the way to a civilization.

Cardbury isn't asking for much, just that you build four buildings with your cards, but getting there is in no way as simple as Klondike. The goal is to build a skyline of four ascending stacks of cards in four different suits in an exact 5-4-3-2 shape, with other things getting in the way of achieving this.

A move consists of drawing two cards and playing a card onto a foundation. You lose if your draw deck runs out, but your time is more limited than that. If upon drawing you have three or more cards of a suit you discard that into a pile; if you make six of these piles or run your hand out you lose. If instead you have one card of each suit and some extras, you make another pile from discarding your draw deck and if this one reaches 13 cards it's also game over.

You must play a card even if it means removing played cards to make way, this means you can only do so on one building per turn. Cards discarded this way do not affect your progress. An empty hand after playing a card onto a stack does not end the game for you if you can draw without running the deck out.

Gameplay is really a reaction to what happens beforehand, with foresight of what you don't want to lose next draw. Every incident costs cards for your stacks, but how you start a stack will also affect your play, best not to need to lose too many cards rebuilding. Only being able to play one card at a time your hand will build up in a way that will cost you time and important cards, so you better start counting.

Deceptively simple, Cardbury efficiently squeezes resource-management gaming into a small game.