Here are the stories from this year's Summerpalooza. Stories are listed on its running order, with the scores next to the entrant name. Semi-final non-qualifiers will be listed by their ranking afterward.
Final:
A. LordApple - 165 points - 7th
The department head (metaphorically) internally sighed. Her employees were running around like headless chickens with no thought in their lack of heads about her wellbeing. They were all just hedonists. She felt like there was something she should shake in disdain, but she wasn't sure what. She decided to get a head start (again metaphorically) on her work. But she just couldn't concentrate, what with the noise, and she only got as far as the bit at the top of the page, whatever it was called. What she needed was a second in command with good air above their shoulders.
B. ArchAngel771 - 108 points - 13th
Its fingers were lovely, their smooth caress a perpetual tingling sensation on my skin, each crease on the fingertip unique. The rhythmic continuous motion was a lullaby of sorts, a silent yet purposeful one. Before the end came, there was an all encompassing peace that settled upon me. Mindful of every stroke on my neck, its melodious breathing proved to be the final jigsaw piece as the world turned dark. The world sunk it on itself as my reality shifted and stirred, but it was always there. My constant, my living, loyal, companion. It was more than enough for me.
C. Lesbian_Syphilitic_Spanker - 182 points - 6th
Johnson woke up with a head start. His neighbor was headbanging to 'Where's your head at?' again, so he couldn't get his needed rest from his headhunting job. 'Cutthroat business', he always said, especially with so many unscrupulous wannabes around. He had to watch his neck if he wanted that promotion. He put on his suit and left for the office. He necked at his coffee and glanced at his newspaper, seeing something about a promising new enterprise: a bunch of college kids with a revolutionary system for predicting stocks fluctuation. He headed out, his mind hatching an evil plan.
D. Pando the Gourmet - 129 points - 9th
The judge brought his gavel down for attention and held his arms high in the air so that the entire court might see his words. The jury had decided, and the judge signaled that the defendant had been found guilty of horse theft and was now sentenced: He would be hung from the neck until dead. The defendant rejoiced, for he knew that men who survived the drop and escaped the noose were set free; It was seen as God's will. His jubilant fist pump ended abruptly as his lawyer informed him that local custom used meat hooks, not nooses.
E. Sparksol - 82 points - 14th
The war party sharpened their spears. The moons were nearly full, which was the sign that The Interloper would soon arrive from the blue opening that would appear in the air. His clashing colors and simplistic babylike movements were, made by a grown creature, an affront to The People, and the frequent noises it made made it clear that he had no idea what proper body language was like. The Interloper was a formidable foe, and it was good that he seemed to have no interest in finding The People's home, for none had yet been able to defeat him.
F. Grimmy - 189 points - 5th
The day is soon to be upon us again. I stare at the pumpkin longingly. Year after year I am denied my chance for revenge. I need my chance to move on from this infernal realm. To be free of all the stares coming from eyes that I cannot see. I will ride the sacred horse on that hallowed day, and claim what should have been mine! No other head will do. I must claim the head of Ichabod and make it my own, and this Halloween may be my last chance to pierce the veil and finally be free.
G. bheiyru - 116 points - 11th
Hobbling, the stranger tangled his foot on a make-shift fishing net. The air grew thick as an ominous calm lingered through the cliff behind him. The shore breathed a salty breeze licking the cold sweat dripping from his neck. He can hear them drawing closer now, he knew the net would take too long to sever. The stranger knew the risk involved in breaking the talisman. Chances of making him whole was close to none but he was willing to die regardless. The groans turned to a sudden scream as the first sound in the empire left his bleeding lips.
H. et246 - 61 points - 20th
It started the fall after the nuclear explosion, as we put, the Nuclear Fall, that the people of no heads became. Thankfully, the adventures were smart, and knew they had no time to lose. Unthankfullly, this was huge! Lich eyes and disembodied smiles suddenly became scarce, and people began to stock up on brain in jars so they could be ready, still....
The adventurer felt a tingle creep up his spine. These crazy creation legends, they couldn't be true, right?
I'm mean that was just creepy man, to be born with eyes above your neck. Good thing that'll never happen...
I. UnusualScar - 72 points - 18th
“Who ARE you?” The Naughty Sorceress shouted at the hot and heavy couple on the harem sofa.
“You’re awesome, Henry,” the girl sighed, ignoring the Sorceress.
“No you are, Anne,” Henry replied.
Irritated, The Naughty Sorceress stamped one of her many eyes. “I’ve lived without a head for centuries! Only the Wall of Skin knows more about headless. Now, get off my sofa.”
Anne disentangled herself. “Sweetie, my last name is Boleyn. I was practically born headless.”
“Well, at least tell me what you’re doing!” The Sorceress shrieked.
“Now, take it easy,” Anne giggled. “And can’t you guess? We’re necking.”
J. Dance_Dance - 71 points - 19th
I feel the warmth of the sun strike my back, and the cool winds sooth my weary bones. I have been dead for seventeen years and twelve days, but I still love how the dawning of each day makes me feel. The streambed I was, mostly, buried next to (after my dismemberment) gurgles merrily- briefly letting me feel alive. Briefly letting me pretend it is the call of my stomach demanding sustenance. I listen to it gurgle and roar, and I am drawn back to the days before. Back to when my own belly juices flowed and made demands. Sigh.
K. doubleJesus - 124 points - 10th
The sun warm upon their neckstalks, years of hard work in the elements shown on leathery skin. Thhhbbbbttthh and Phbbbbbt worked the land and clacked away to pass the time, vertebrae rapidly vibrating against a meaty tongue-like protrusion. A variably pitched series of smacks echoed in the valley. Both conversation as well as surveying the area as the sounds traveled from the surrounding terrain, flora and fauna then back into sensitive internal organs. Thhhbbbbttthh turned to Phbbbbbt after a lull in conversation, "Why do we do this backbreaking labor?" Phbbbbbt thought deeply then shrugged, "To get a head in life."
L. Aeshma - 227 points - 3rd
ordzoK moved through the dense grass and saw omloK at a distance. ordzoK allowed his spherical body to slump to the left side so that his free hand could wave to omloK. omloK did the same before returning to his osmosis position resting on fists. The round, bulbous body and expansive arms made moving easy, at least on level or downward sloping surfaces. Eating did not happen, but the sphaeraS simply absorbed their sustenance, which they found on the ground like most animals. Special skin receptors transformed matter into energy rich paste, which was easily absorbed through their rough hide.
M. Phantax - 477 points - 1st
Now he knew what that constant sense of incompleteness that he felt was. Alexander stared at the monstrosity lying dead at his feet. It was like looking at a mirror, with one difference: where his neckstalk ended, a large fleshy structure protruded instead. Alexander turned away, shuddering. The sight was hideous, and yet! It was whole. Perfect. Entranced, he got down on all fours and crept towards the corpse and, in a single stroke, cut off the protrusion. Setting the bloody lump on his neckstalk, he began to look for his sewing kit. It was time to make some stitches.
N. Brickthor - 25 points - 23rd
Have ye ever heard of the Great Hamburglar Buttface Battle whence Ronald and Grimace 'came addled? What began as a squirmish in Pea Farmer Wormish had all of us nearly saddled. Near the end all was dark but for light of sleeze rays blasting to and fro. Elixir prices were high, stench resistances low. Onward blazed that tiny squirmish become war. All sought Peas but only found Hey Deze door. Space tours tripplets melted, Hamburglar was belted, and the whole Headless Council got paddled. Then, guns blazing, appeared Butt Rogers from deep space, uniting all and saving all Butt Face.
O. Monechetti - 76 points - 16th
Vine-green necks whipped side to side as the hydra thrashed in agony. Porkules thrust his hand into the stomach of the creature and pulled out a sandwich, thinking “this is what you get for eating my lunch”. The hydra slammed its necks into the ground in anger and frustration, and also because it was dying as Porkules walked away. He placed the sandwich, glistening and wet from the hydra stomach, on top of his neck, where it plopped with a wet squelch. “Tastes like hate”, he thought. The beast sunk quickly into the pudding on the floor. Circle of life.
P. OrangeDyna - 110 points - 12th
People tell me I think too much. Which gets me thinking. How can I think? I think that there ought to be something biological in which my thoughts originate and collect, but I can find no such organ. I've studied the body, poured over textbooks, read medical autopsies. I cannot find what I seek. It's driving me to insanity. What I have conjured in my imagination looks grotesque. This spherical mass protruding from my top. And although I am frightened, something just feels right. No one else can fathom what I have fathomed. I guess I just think too much.
Q. umnikos - 25 points - 22nd
It was the day that he waited for over a month, even though he couldn't tell anyone about it. He went to the place at the right time, waiting for the moment. He heard it with his own feet and started to ran towards it. He was running so fast, that without his boots he wouldn't be able to hear with his feet anymore. Five minutes passed and he saw it, standing before his hands. This man hasn't been more amazed in his life before. Before him was the first candies skittles that don't require a mouth to be eaten.
R. gridmark - 423 points - 2nd
A noose but no head. Where is it?! The girl hyperventilates, patting around the stump of her neck to find what was lost. The headless phantoms around her gave her strange looks, how such a feat could be accomplished she didn't ask. Had her head rolled away when she killed herself? Or simply never existed. She tried to ask if the billowing smoke around her knew but the words croaked and died in her throat. Was this the end? A sad, headless life floating in vast darkness? But then again she had no proof that life should be anything else.
S. JXQZ - 79 points - 15th
I looked around my room and started to scratch my neck. Something was wrong. I think my mom redecorated or something.
Walking by my dads old hat (more like a plate), I found a brand new set of curtains hanging up.
I'm picky when it matters and this mattered to me.
"Mom," I yelled out. "Did you buy me new curtains?"
Mom walked out of her room, wearing a blue robe. She had a towel on her stump, after her shower.
"Yeah, why?"
I scoffed."I don't want new curtains mom!"
She laughed, "okay, fine, don't lose your head over it."
T. Ranzer - 75 points - 17th
Chaos. Everyone remembered where they were when it happened, screams among the streets, horrible growths erupting from bodies, dead dry tendrils flowing from their tops. Fleshy growths erupted from their sides, massive wet and gasping holes opening in their bottoms. Multicolored orbs dripping saltwater were uncovered by their protective flaps of flesh, bright light shining painfully into them and making their inner workings contract in reflex. Slow wheezes were heard, and everyone knew things would never be the same after that fateful phrase that everyone cursed: “Major update: Adventurers are now aware of a body part known as the ‘head’.”
U. Manss2001 - 30 points - 21st
Ralph poured the phial into his punch, the whole town was going to be at the annual summer block party. Little did he know, Stacy was on to his plan. Music is bumping, people are gesticulating to one another, everyone is having a great time, Ralph decides it's time, and sets his 'punch' out with the rest of the snacks. Just as the guests begin to flock over to the meal-table, Stacy quickly grabs the phial from Ralph's pocket, and shows everyone what Ralph was really up to, before anyone can pour the punch down their neck-holes. Take his hands!!
V. Nahtmmm - 138 points - 8th
Florence's foot hung suspended, frozen in sheer fright. Her nemesis, Black Vest McSchnerdle, was standing before her! Hesitatingly, she tapped out phrases informing him that this part of the canyon was her father's claim and that McSchnerdle’s prompt departure was desired. Instead, with an arrogant sneer in his legs, he backed her against a cliff wall, then twiddled his armstache while announcing via body language that he now possessed her, a beauty with pride. Florence raised her foot to scream, but he leaped forward, lifted her from the ground, tucked her under his arm, and headed for the railroad tracks.
W. Walowitz - 141 points - 4th
As I emerged from the damp blackness, I was greeted by an overwhelming smell and bright light I somehow knew was the sun. Grass. That was the smell. Using my... hands... I got to my feet... My feet! My stomach growled and I knew this feeling was called hunger, although when I searched my memory I couldn't find how to satiate it. Another of us passed by and I felt... Love. Lust. Memory couldn't distinguish. We embraced and the next morning my stomach swelled although I was still hungry. As my sight faded, a memory surfaced. Here comes another us.
Non-qualifiers:
Semi-Final 1:
fureru23 - 11th
A haunting wail resonates around the bar. Sometimes, the wail becomes a pitiful murmur. A slime sits beside a dullahan. “Why do those stingy humans hate me?! I just want to become a human too! ” The slime sobbed. “That’s because you absorbed a lot of people’s organs.” “I just took one organ from each person! They won’t die if I just took a portion of them!” The slime retorted. “Well, people need organs like livers and hearts. If I were them I’ll really hate you too if you tried to take my neck.” The dullahan shakes his neck, exasperated.
Llamasoup - 12th
My name is Dave, and I have something on my neck. Yes I am aware that sounds crazy. You most likely are aware that others do not have something on their neck sometimes people don't have necks at all (if their dead) but I, DAVE stand alone. You may wonder what is on my neck, I call it a tõenäosus. I believe that my tõenäosus shows proof of another dimension! One where everybody has a tõenäosus on their neck! One day I will feel accepted in that world... (oddly enough Dave has a foot on his neck not a head)
jagr88 - 13th
Book Club. Somehow, that seemed ineffective. A club made of books; questions rose. Is it glued together? Would whacking someone in the neck with a Book Club hurt them, or give them knowledge? The answers are unclear. Further reading is required. Upon further developments, there is a lack of violence, and an excess of discussion. This is some sort of live book discussion forum. These book club members must be using those new text to noise devices. This must be Science Fiction. To think, understanding words as meaningful noise. Ah, what a lovely future we can to look forward to.
Oracle_163 - 14th
He fingered the long chain thoughtfully. Deep in the middle of his prize dig in ancient Hapuddo (time analysis placed it at 2150 AD), Archaeologist Graeme Bowit Lee faced his most puzzling challenge. He twirled his communication appendage absentmindedly. Caked in grime and buried inconspicuously under layers of pottery, he'd never seen anything like it before. It rested on the ribcage of an ancient "human" skeleton; a slender silver cord with a jewel, almost weightless in his hands but beautifully wrought, its purpose unknown. These "human" ancestors! Graeme sighed in irritation and walked away from yet another archaeological dead end.
Semi-Final 2:
MooseBlaster - 11th
Dr.Cababage bent over to pick up his dog, because goodness knows leashes are useless here. He was just about to head home from his walk. He waited until there was a thumping in his chest, before turning to confirm his direction. He had just gotten the new GPSWatch, an essential for any citizen of Notenemos-Cabezas. After pausing to register the vibrations of the watch pulsing through his chest, he turned about 62.8 degrees and headed home. He missed having his electro-brain-assimilator. He felt something was missing without it. He couldn't figure out what though, because he didn't have it on.
Quintavirus - 12th
Desiring another drink, she pointed expectantly to the picture of the house cabernet, but the waiter did not respond. She pointed again to the red wine, more sternly than before, but again no response. It was clear that she was cut off, but she wasn’t drunk at all! Quickly rising from her seat, she grabbed the waiter by his vest and tie and began to shake violently. Throwing him down, she turned to find the busboy already mopping up the wine from her chair. Very calmly, he pointed toward the sign on the wall that read “We don’t serve rednecks".
MarenG9 - 13th
"Sigh. Not another empty sk8board. Why do those weird sk8boards keep appearing, anyway?" she thought. Earlier, our hero had tried on something called a "shirt." A letter fell out, but when she went to investigate, the store counter was empty. The rest of the day on the eXtreme Slope passed in a blur of terrible skateboarding moves and angry yetis. The adventurer staggered back down the mountain. She thrust Groar’s bloody fur toward the Trapper. He took it and transformed it into a strange object. How was she supposed to put it on? “Where do these HATS keep coming from?!”
pasta dragonman1111 - 14th
once there was an huge kingdom with allot of wizards and magical creatures.
it was peaceful until a monster came and stole all magic and used it to make
an army of demonic servants to rule over the kingdom.
but luckily there was a wizard who was to powerful to be draint from all of his magic his name was jarlsberg the most powerful wizard in the kingdom.
so the wizard embarked on an quest to slay the monster and retrieve all the stolen magic.
on his way he met 2 other adventures boris and sneakypete.
they kill the monster.
Final:
A. LordApple - 165 points - 7th
The department head (metaphorically) internally sighed. Her employees were running around like headless chickens with no thought in their lack of heads about her wellbeing. They were all just hedonists. She felt like there was something she should shake in disdain, but she wasn't sure what. She decided to get a head start (again metaphorically) on her work. But she just couldn't concentrate, what with the noise, and she only got as far as the bit at the top of the page, whatever it was called. What she needed was a second in command with good air above their shoulders.
B. ArchAngel771 - 108 points - 13th
Its fingers were lovely, their smooth caress a perpetual tingling sensation on my skin, each crease on the fingertip unique. The rhythmic continuous motion was a lullaby of sorts, a silent yet purposeful one. Before the end came, there was an all encompassing peace that settled upon me. Mindful of every stroke on my neck, its melodious breathing proved to be the final jigsaw piece as the world turned dark. The world sunk it on itself as my reality shifted and stirred, but it was always there. My constant, my living, loyal, companion. It was more than enough for me.
C. Lesbian_Syphilitic_Spanker - 182 points - 6th
Johnson woke up with a head start. His neighbor was headbanging to 'Where's your head at?' again, so he couldn't get his needed rest from his headhunting job. 'Cutthroat business', he always said, especially with so many unscrupulous wannabes around. He had to watch his neck if he wanted that promotion. He put on his suit and left for the office. He necked at his coffee and glanced at his newspaper, seeing something about a promising new enterprise: a bunch of college kids with a revolutionary system for predicting stocks fluctuation. He headed out, his mind hatching an evil plan.
D. Pando the Gourmet - 129 points - 9th
The judge brought his gavel down for attention and held his arms high in the air so that the entire court might see his words. The jury had decided, and the judge signaled that the defendant had been found guilty of horse theft and was now sentenced: He would be hung from the neck until dead. The defendant rejoiced, for he knew that men who survived the drop and escaped the noose were set free; It was seen as God's will. His jubilant fist pump ended abruptly as his lawyer informed him that local custom used meat hooks, not nooses.
E. Sparksol - 82 points - 14th
The war party sharpened their spears. The moons were nearly full, which was the sign that The Interloper would soon arrive from the blue opening that would appear in the air. His clashing colors and simplistic babylike movements were, made by a grown creature, an affront to The People, and the frequent noises it made made it clear that he had no idea what proper body language was like. The Interloper was a formidable foe, and it was good that he seemed to have no interest in finding The People's home, for none had yet been able to defeat him.
F. Grimmy - 189 points - 5th
The day is soon to be upon us again. I stare at the pumpkin longingly. Year after year I am denied my chance for revenge. I need my chance to move on from this infernal realm. To be free of all the stares coming from eyes that I cannot see. I will ride the sacred horse on that hallowed day, and claim what should have been mine! No other head will do. I must claim the head of Ichabod and make it my own, and this Halloween may be my last chance to pierce the veil and finally be free.
G. bheiyru - 116 points - 11th
Hobbling, the stranger tangled his foot on a make-shift fishing net. The air grew thick as an ominous calm lingered through the cliff behind him. The shore breathed a salty breeze licking the cold sweat dripping from his neck. He can hear them drawing closer now, he knew the net would take too long to sever. The stranger knew the risk involved in breaking the talisman. Chances of making him whole was close to none but he was willing to die regardless. The groans turned to a sudden scream as the first sound in the empire left his bleeding lips.
H. et246 - 61 points - 20th
It started the fall after the nuclear explosion, as we put, the Nuclear Fall, that the people of no heads became. Thankfully, the adventures were smart, and knew they had no time to lose. Unthankfullly, this was huge! Lich eyes and disembodied smiles suddenly became scarce, and people began to stock up on brain in jars so they could be ready, still....
The adventurer felt a tingle creep up his spine. These crazy creation legends, they couldn't be true, right?
I'm mean that was just creepy man, to be born with eyes above your neck. Good thing that'll never happen...
I. UnusualScar - 72 points - 18th
“Who ARE you?” The Naughty Sorceress shouted at the hot and heavy couple on the harem sofa.
“You’re awesome, Henry,” the girl sighed, ignoring the Sorceress.
“No you are, Anne,” Henry replied.
Irritated, The Naughty Sorceress stamped one of her many eyes. “I’ve lived without a head for centuries! Only the Wall of Skin knows more about headless. Now, get off my sofa.”
Anne disentangled herself. “Sweetie, my last name is Boleyn. I was practically born headless.”
“Well, at least tell me what you’re doing!” The Sorceress shrieked.
“Now, take it easy,” Anne giggled. “And can’t you guess? We’re necking.”
J. Dance_Dance - 71 points - 19th
I feel the warmth of the sun strike my back, and the cool winds sooth my weary bones. I have been dead for seventeen years and twelve days, but I still love how the dawning of each day makes me feel. The streambed I was, mostly, buried next to (after my dismemberment) gurgles merrily- briefly letting me feel alive. Briefly letting me pretend it is the call of my stomach demanding sustenance. I listen to it gurgle and roar, and I am drawn back to the days before. Back to when my own belly juices flowed and made demands. Sigh.
K. doubleJesus - 124 points - 10th
The sun warm upon their neckstalks, years of hard work in the elements shown on leathery skin. Thhhbbbbttthh and Phbbbbbt worked the land and clacked away to pass the time, vertebrae rapidly vibrating against a meaty tongue-like protrusion. A variably pitched series of smacks echoed in the valley. Both conversation as well as surveying the area as the sounds traveled from the surrounding terrain, flora and fauna then back into sensitive internal organs. Thhhbbbbttthh turned to Phbbbbbt after a lull in conversation, "Why do we do this backbreaking labor?" Phbbbbbt thought deeply then shrugged, "To get a head in life."
L. Aeshma - 227 points - 3rd
ordzoK moved through the dense grass and saw omloK at a distance. ordzoK allowed his spherical body to slump to the left side so that his free hand could wave to omloK. omloK did the same before returning to his osmosis position resting on fists. The round, bulbous body and expansive arms made moving easy, at least on level or downward sloping surfaces. Eating did not happen, but the sphaeraS simply absorbed their sustenance, which they found on the ground like most animals. Special skin receptors transformed matter into energy rich paste, which was easily absorbed through their rough hide.
M. Phantax - 477 points - 1st
Now he knew what that constant sense of incompleteness that he felt was. Alexander stared at the monstrosity lying dead at his feet. It was like looking at a mirror, with one difference: where his neckstalk ended, a large fleshy structure protruded instead. Alexander turned away, shuddering. The sight was hideous, and yet! It was whole. Perfect. Entranced, he got down on all fours and crept towards the corpse and, in a single stroke, cut off the protrusion. Setting the bloody lump on his neckstalk, he began to look for his sewing kit. It was time to make some stitches.
N. Brickthor - 25 points - 23rd
Have ye ever heard of the Great Hamburglar Buttface Battle whence Ronald and Grimace 'came addled? What began as a squirmish in Pea Farmer Wormish had all of us nearly saddled. Near the end all was dark but for light of sleeze rays blasting to and fro. Elixir prices were high, stench resistances low. Onward blazed that tiny squirmish become war. All sought Peas but only found Hey Deze door. Space tours tripplets melted, Hamburglar was belted, and the whole Headless Council got paddled. Then, guns blazing, appeared Butt Rogers from deep space, uniting all and saving all Butt Face.
O. Monechetti - 76 points - 16th
Vine-green necks whipped side to side as the hydra thrashed in agony. Porkules thrust his hand into the stomach of the creature and pulled out a sandwich, thinking “this is what you get for eating my lunch”. The hydra slammed its necks into the ground in anger and frustration, and also because it was dying as Porkules walked away. He placed the sandwich, glistening and wet from the hydra stomach, on top of his neck, where it plopped with a wet squelch. “Tastes like hate”, he thought. The beast sunk quickly into the pudding on the floor. Circle of life.
P. OrangeDyna - 110 points - 12th
People tell me I think too much. Which gets me thinking. How can I think? I think that there ought to be something biological in which my thoughts originate and collect, but I can find no such organ. I've studied the body, poured over textbooks, read medical autopsies. I cannot find what I seek. It's driving me to insanity. What I have conjured in my imagination looks grotesque. This spherical mass protruding from my top. And although I am frightened, something just feels right. No one else can fathom what I have fathomed. I guess I just think too much.
Q. umnikos - 25 points - 22nd
It was the day that he waited for over a month, even though he couldn't tell anyone about it. He went to the place at the right time, waiting for the moment. He heard it with his own feet and started to ran towards it. He was running so fast, that without his boots he wouldn't be able to hear with his feet anymore. Five minutes passed and he saw it, standing before his hands. This man hasn't been more amazed in his life before. Before him was the first candies skittles that don't require a mouth to be eaten.
R. gridmark - 423 points - 2nd
A noose but no head. Where is it?! The girl hyperventilates, patting around the stump of her neck to find what was lost. The headless phantoms around her gave her strange looks, how such a feat could be accomplished she didn't ask. Had her head rolled away when she killed herself? Or simply never existed. She tried to ask if the billowing smoke around her knew but the words croaked and died in her throat. Was this the end? A sad, headless life floating in vast darkness? But then again she had no proof that life should be anything else.
S. JXQZ - 79 points - 15th
I looked around my room and started to scratch my neck. Something was wrong. I think my mom redecorated or something.
Walking by my dads old hat (more like a plate), I found a brand new set of curtains hanging up.
I'm picky when it matters and this mattered to me.
"Mom," I yelled out. "Did you buy me new curtains?"
Mom walked out of her room, wearing a blue robe. She had a towel on her stump, after her shower.
"Yeah, why?"
I scoffed."I don't want new curtains mom!"
She laughed, "okay, fine, don't lose your head over it."
T. Ranzer - 75 points - 17th
Chaos. Everyone remembered where they were when it happened, screams among the streets, horrible growths erupting from bodies, dead dry tendrils flowing from their tops. Fleshy growths erupted from their sides, massive wet and gasping holes opening in their bottoms. Multicolored orbs dripping saltwater were uncovered by their protective flaps of flesh, bright light shining painfully into them and making their inner workings contract in reflex. Slow wheezes were heard, and everyone knew things would never be the same after that fateful phrase that everyone cursed: “Major update: Adventurers are now aware of a body part known as the ‘head’.”
U. Manss2001 - 30 points - 21st
Ralph poured the phial into his punch, the whole town was going to be at the annual summer block party. Little did he know, Stacy was on to his plan. Music is bumping, people are gesticulating to one another, everyone is having a great time, Ralph decides it's time, and sets his 'punch' out with the rest of the snacks. Just as the guests begin to flock over to the meal-table, Stacy quickly grabs the phial from Ralph's pocket, and shows everyone what Ralph was really up to, before anyone can pour the punch down their neck-holes. Take his hands!!
V. Nahtmmm - 138 points - 8th
Florence's foot hung suspended, frozen in sheer fright. Her nemesis, Black Vest McSchnerdle, was standing before her! Hesitatingly, she tapped out phrases informing him that this part of the canyon was her father's claim and that McSchnerdle’s prompt departure was desired. Instead, with an arrogant sneer in his legs, he backed her against a cliff wall, then twiddled his armstache while announcing via body language that he now possessed her, a beauty with pride. Florence raised her foot to scream, but he leaped forward, lifted her from the ground, tucked her under his arm, and headed for the railroad tracks.
W. Walowitz - 141 points - 4th
As I emerged from the damp blackness, I was greeted by an overwhelming smell and bright light I somehow knew was the sun. Grass. That was the smell. Using my... hands... I got to my feet... My feet! My stomach growled and I knew this feeling was called hunger, although when I searched my memory I couldn't find how to satiate it. Another of us passed by and I felt... Love. Lust. Memory couldn't distinguish. We embraced and the next morning my stomach swelled although I was still hungry. As my sight faded, a memory surfaced. Here comes another us.
Non-qualifiers:
Semi-Final 1:
fureru23 - 11th
A haunting wail resonates around the bar. Sometimes, the wail becomes a pitiful murmur. A slime sits beside a dullahan. “Why do those stingy humans hate me?! I just want to become a human too! ” The slime sobbed. “That’s because you absorbed a lot of people’s organs.” “I just took one organ from each person! They won’t die if I just took a portion of them!” The slime retorted. “Well, people need organs like livers and hearts. If I were them I’ll really hate you too if you tried to take my neck.” The dullahan shakes his neck, exasperated.
Llamasoup - 12th
My name is Dave, and I have something on my neck. Yes I am aware that sounds crazy. You most likely are aware that others do not have something on their neck sometimes people don't have necks at all (if their dead) but I, DAVE stand alone. You may wonder what is on my neck, I call it a tõenäosus. I believe that my tõenäosus shows proof of another dimension! One where everybody has a tõenäosus on their neck! One day I will feel accepted in that world... (oddly enough Dave has a foot on his neck not a head)
jagr88 - 13th
Book Club. Somehow, that seemed ineffective. A club made of books; questions rose. Is it glued together? Would whacking someone in the neck with a Book Club hurt them, or give them knowledge? The answers are unclear. Further reading is required. Upon further developments, there is a lack of violence, and an excess of discussion. This is some sort of live book discussion forum. These book club members must be using those new text to noise devices. This must be Science Fiction. To think, understanding words as meaningful noise. Ah, what a lovely future we can to look forward to.
Oracle_163 - 14th
He fingered the long chain thoughtfully. Deep in the middle of his prize dig in ancient Hapuddo (time analysis placed it at 2150 AD), Archaeologist Graeme Bowit Lee faced his most puzzling challenge. He twirled his communication appendage absentmindedly. Caked in grime and buried inconspicuously under layers of pottery, he'd never seen anything like it before. It rested on the ribcage of an ancient "human" skeleton; a slender silver cord with a jewel, almost weightless in his hands but beautifully wrought, its purpose unknown. These "human" ancestors! Graeme sighed in irritation and walked away from yet another archaeological dead end.
Semi-Final 2:
MooseBlaster - 11th
Dr.Cababage bent over to pick up his dog, because goodness knows leashes are useless here. He was just about to head home from his walk. He waited until there was a thumping in his chest, before turning to confirm his direction. He had just gotten the new GPSWatch, an essential for any citizen of Notenemos-Cabezas. After pausing to register the vibrations of the watch pulsing through his chest, he turned about 62.8 degrees and headed home. He missed having his electro-brain-assimilator. He felt something was missing without it. He couldn't figure out what though, because he didn't have it on.
Quintavirus - 12th
Desiring another drink, she pointed expectantly to the picture of the house cabernet, but the waiter did not respond. She pointed again to the red wine, more sternly than before, but again no response. It was clear that she was cut off, but she wasn’t drunk at all! Quickly rising from her seat, she grabbed the waiter by his vest and tie and began to shake violently. Throwing him down, she turned to find the busboy already mopping up the wine from her chair. Very calmly, he pointed toward the sign on the wall that read “We don’t serve rednecks".
MarenG9 - 13th
"Sigh. Not another empty sk8board. Why do those weird sk8boards keep appearing, anyway?" she thought. Earlier, our hero had tried on something called a "shirt." A letter fell out, but when she went to investigate, the store counter was empty. The rest of the day on the eXtreme Slope passed in a blur of terrible skateboarding moves and angry yetis. The adventurer staggered back down the mountain. She thrust Groar’s bloody fur toward the Trapper. He took it and transformed it into a strange object. How was she supposed to put it on? “Where do these HATS keep coming from?!”
pasta dragonman1111 - 14th
once there was an huge kingdom with allot of wizards and magical creatures.
it was peaceful until a monster came and stole all magic and used it to make
an army of demonic servants to rule over the kingdom.
but luckily there was a wizard who was to powerful to be draint from all of his magic his name was jarlsberg the most powerful wizard in the kingdom.
so the wizard embarked on an quest to slay the monster and retrieve all the stolen magic.
on his way he met 2 other adventures boris and sneakypete.
they kill the monster.
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